man in a box

Jezzzzussss did I just scream!

Mad. bitter. upset. confused. hate. sorrow. sympathy are all the emotions running threw my veins. My blood boiled for a hot minute and it reminded me of the past im trying to leave behind. I feel bad for being such a bitch but feel as there is not other way to get my point across.

As the icing to the cake I wish not to EVER eat.. The unsteady feeling I keep having Monday threw Friday is getting old. How is that a 30 year old man can act like a 18 year old boy. If all his pretentious freinds make him feel complete and driving around a lent 200K car makes you feel glamorous, then what is it to think of how my life is going? Im happy with my 3 bdrm townhouse, family, 2 dogs and new VW.

This is how I see it... I am EXTREMELY materialistic and feel the neccessity to purchase nice things for myself and others around me. I love to travel, play video games, go out, dinners, laugh with fam and friends and write (obviously). All the 'materialistic' things I purchase make me happy with my apperance, but all the other things I listed above complete me on the inside and make me who I am. I'm honored and glad to say I have a great family and friends which TRUELY care. I see people brag about this sorta thing all the time, but I see/know there not at such a stable and happy place as I have been the past few weeks.

Closing Statement: I'm going to continue to be 'selfish' and do what I wanna do. If you dont like it then... (look at the sienna miller pic, says it all)